| Helping Mom and Dad take the plunge
As boomers face the emotional task of moving aging parents from the family home, a new industry is born - senior transitioning
By Carolyn Leitch, Globe Real Estate
As a home-stager in Toronto's thriving real estate market for several years, Marsha Silverberg was accustomed to uncovering gracious houses hidden behind the accumulations of a lifetime: the little boys' hockey skates dating back to Bobby Orr's playing days, layers of nearly fossilized wallpaper, and complete sets of treasured china.
But at the centre of it all, she often found, was an apprehensive senior reluctant to leave the house.
For the most part, Ms. Silverberg was not daunted by the piles of detritus or outmoded decorating. "I saw past all that and focused on the senior citizens themselves."
More recently, she has cofused her home-staging business, Richmond Hill-based Marsha's Helping Hands, on a specialized portion of the real estate market. She works with elderly people who are making the move to a smaller house, condominium, retirement residence or nursing home. "I noticed a common link -- they were frightened and overwhelmed," she says of the homeowners she has encountered. "Their emotions were not their own."
In some cases, the elderly client has children too busy to help, or has recently lost a husband or wife. To them, the house represents their comfort and security, their identity and history.
"It's a U-Haul of a whole lifetime that has to go somewhere."
Marsha Silverberg,
home-stager who owns Marsha's Helping Hands
She becomes the organizer, the shrink and the physical labourer.
Ms. Silverberg is a baby boomer herself, so she understands, she says, that people of her generation are all too busy with their own lives to spend that much time with their parents.
"I'm the daughter or daughter-in-law they don't have."
She says the elderly feel defeated by the prospect of sorting through all of their belongings. Just pushing the hangers aside to sort through clothes in the closet may take more effort than some are able to muster.
They don't know how to choose which items or pieces of furniture to take to the new space, and they worry that possessions will be broken in the move.
"It's a U-Haul of a whole lifetime that has to go somewhere."
Ms. Silverberg gets to know a lot of personal history along the way.
 
"One hundred per cent of the people show me pictures of their lives."
She often compiles an album of 50 or so photographs and leaves it with the client at the end of the job. People accumulate so many photos over the decades that she often throws the rest out. The kids, she says, usually don't want them.
"We live in a world of decluttering. When I go in, I'm not really passing things on. Nobody wants it."
Ms. Silverberg is adept at sizing up the new dwelling, which could be a smaller house or -- in about 90 per cent of cases -- a retirement home. She can quickly decide which pieces of furniture will fit and be the most useful.
Once the merchandise is sorted, she enlists the home-owner's help in holding a contents sale or calls in dealers to buy up the vintage furniture and pieces.
"They come in and offer money so [the homeowners] get a little bit excited," she says. "I get them really involved in the project. I try to boost their morale."
Consignment shops will often buy the clothing -- especially the very expensive pieces she finds hidden away in closets.
"There are many, many specialized vintage places that love to get their hands on this stuff."
Ms. Silverberg gets into the basements and attics herself -- often donning gloves and a mask to sort through every box and cupboard.
Photos, tea pots, tea cups and sentimental gifts are often the possessions that hold the greatest resonance. "I know how to listen for their favourite things. I make sure it's sitting right where they see it as soon as they walk in."
In front of one house on Oriole Parkway recently, Ms. Silverberg had dump trucks lined up in front. Now the painter is at work and soon Ms. Silverberg will bring in some contemporary furniture.
Muscles are an asset when working with Ms. Silverberg, who says that one of her two assistants is a body builder.
For the homeowner and her family, she says, an investment of less than $10,000 could lead to a bidding war on the house in a coveted neighbourhood.
At one of her projects on Douglas Drive, the client invested $7,000 in giving the house a facelift, according to Ms. Silverberg's recommendations. The owner received multiple offers and sold the house for $115,000 over the asking price of $615,000.
In some cases, real estate agents call Ms. Silverberg in when seniors have talked about putting a house on the market but balk at signing the listing.
"They say, 'It's too big of a job. Maybe I should just die here'."
So the agent will invite her in to provide a free half-hour consultation. In some cases, that's all of the reassurance that the homeowner needs.
While the combination of a little support and reassurance makes most clients enjoyable to work with, Ms. Silverberg says, she recalls one "obsessive-compulsive" woman who needed to see everything. Her house was overflowing with clutter and the task became very arduous.
"They can't look at every little thing. They have to trust me."
Ms. Silverberg is not the only home-stager who specializes in working with seniors. But she carved her niche a little deeper when she began to concentrate on the Jewish community.
She is the daughter of Holocaust survivors and she knows that they have the same emotions as all seniors moving to a nursing home or retirement residence, but some added trigger points.
Once the family members understand that she has experience in dealing with those fears, she says, "they understand that I speak their language."
"I go to the max to comfort them. I do whatever I can to make them comfortable."
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